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Feeling Ostomistic
Tuesday, April 01 2014

You know what I am really sick and tired of? People who are judgemental and quick to judge to judge me.

Today I went along with my husband who was fixing a friends computer and I met his new partner as his late wife passed about a year ago.

We were sitting there talking (well more her whinging and complaining about everything) and I was trying to be supportive and engaging in conversation. Well that was until she started with her judgemental banter.

At first she started talking about 'boat people' and how she claimed they come to Australia illegally and get more money, more entitlements and benefits than 'Australians' more so pensioners.

She went on about how Pensioners are living under the poverty line and how illegal immigrants and even 'young people like you' don't work yet get more money than pensioners.

She went onto say how she feels she is being punished by centrelink for having a partner and assests and how she is fed up of being the victim of 'poverty'.

So thats when I piped up and quite frank couldn't bite my tongue much longer.

I asked her what evidence she had that illegal immigrants get more money than Australians? She said 'it is just what I have heard'.

I then asked her what she meant by her comment 'people like you' who don't work. She said that the younger generation, like myself have no work ethic and just choose to stay home at the expense of tax payers and as she knew I wasn't working that she assumed that was what I did.

I was quite angry at this point as one thing that frustrates me more is people who don't know me decide to judge me.

I said to her "I don't work out of choice or because I am lazy but because I am unwell." When I told her that I had my bowel removed last year due to bowel cancer and before that had to stop working as the medically induced menopause I was under made me too ill.

I told her that I have held a job since I was 14 and worked fulltime up until my health forced to me stop.

All she said was 'oh, I just assumed you wanted to stay home as I knew your husband worked'.

I told her that if I could have a conventional job I would, that I don't choose to be sick and I work my ass off in any given job.

There was no apology, there was no empathy.

Mind you I do dress nicely, we have a nice car and I have nice jewellery. But these are all things that my husband and I have worked hard for to have and things I had before I stopped working.

I always love the quote 'You should never assume. It makes an ass out of you and me'.

You should never judge someone and there is a saying that:

"Until you have walked a mile in someones shoes

you should never judge the path someone has been on".

Although someone looks normal or healthy you should never assume there is nothing wrong with them. Most illnesses are invisible to the naked eye meaning you can't see what illness and disease someone has on the inside by looking at them. As most people I know who are sick just grin, bear a fake smile and to the unknown looks like everything is A.O.K.


Posted by: talya AT 08:30 am   |  Permalink   |  Email

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Talya Goding - Feeling Ostomistic  |  0447 426 860

Thank you for stopping by Feeling Ostomistic. It has taken a lot of courage to share my story and I ask that you show me and my site/blog respect and courtesy. Views expressed in this blog are my own and I am not a nurse or a doctor. If you need medical advice please seek your medical practitioner.

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