Sunday, July 31 2016
For those who have been following along through my mirco-blogging on my Facebook page would know that I recently (about a month ago now) entered into the care of Palliative Care and that my chemo and treatment options stopped.
I will write about that on my blog shortly, just been hard finding the words to say.
But since then I have wanted to make a point of living life and not just existing like I have been, especially while I was on chemo. It was making me so sick that I really didn't feel like myself anymore and I spent a lot of time in bed or on the lounge and I was just existing.... and I really wanted to experience new things and make memories.
So the week after my treatment stopped I went away on a Canteen over 18's camp and had a ball!
When I got back it was school holidays so I had my 14 year old sister come and stay for the week. I wanted to have such a fun filled week planned that I wasn't really looking after myself and resting (especially after such a big week with the canteen camp the week prior). But I found a chemist that was offering FREE makeup lessons to teenage girls in the school holidays, and she really enjoyed learning about how to apply a natural makeup look perfect for school. The next day we went and got pampered with manicures, pedicures and facials (I had never done these before). I even took her to brunch to my favourite spot by the waters edge, and that night we went to Hogs Breath for dinner and she said it was the best steak she had ever eaten!
Then it was time for her to go home, and when she got picked up my other sister (15 year old) got dropped off for her week to stay.
I felt so guilty while she was staying with me, as I was so tired from the previous two weeks, that all I wanted to do was mostly rest and take it easy. She was okay with it as she was enjoying the quiet and break from all the other siblings. I organised the makeup lesson for her too, and the chemist even had a VIP beauty night which we went along to and she won the lucky door prize! I also took her to brunch, but didn't take her to be pampered, frankly I couldn't afford it again (I did buy her something as a consolation prize).
It was nice having my sisters stay with us, they were both so helpful and willing to help me around the house or help me if I was trying to walk or climb stairs... we didn't want them to go home, it was nice having a youthful feeling in the house.... but mostly I was loving having company of a day and someone to talk to and not being lonely while Russ was at work.
So last weekend was our 6th wedding anniversary and we decided to go away for a few days and stay at a cabin at South West Rocks. We dropped my sister off at her house on the way, then we went Pokemon hunting for an hour or so and then we checked into the cabin and had a nap. I was so exhausted! The cabin was rather nice had 2 bathrooms which were rather spacious (just what I need and prefer) and it was right by the water's edge.
We went out to dinner that night to celebrate my brother's early 21st birthday with all the family and had a rather nice meal, then we went Pokemon hunting again, this time with my siblings. We had our 11 year old brother with us, but we lost track of the time and soon was 10PM and there were messages from mum to get him home as he had school the next day (whoops). But he was loving it.
Then we had a nice sleep in the next day (Monday) and decided to go to Port Macquarie to lunch (all you can eat buffet) and then go for a huge walk and pokemon hunt.
Palliative Care hired a wheelchair for me to try and to help me get out and about more for walks with Russ and to make things less painful for me.
I was rather nervous using the wheelchair for the first time, was worried people would stare or laugh. But people smiled and nodded, and I was holding both mine and Russ' phones and catching the pokemon... I have the two phones at once skill down pat.
Our walk was about 2 hours and I think we did 4km or so in total, Russ was feeling rather tired and I was starting to get in pain so we decided to head home while it was still daylight.
Right where our car was parked in Port Macquarie there was a wall with painted angel wings, and a sign that explained what it was about. You are to stand in front of the wings and take a picture and upload to social media using the hashtag #ifweallhadwings and it was to raise awareness of a NFP (not for profit) in Port that helps to alleviate the financial stress for someone undergoing cancer treatment. Here is my picture below.
So we headed home (well back to the cabin) and ordered Chinese for dinner and had a nap... I didn't realise how late it was and I had promised my siblings that I would help them with assignments and it was 8PM when I realised the time... so we called around to my brother's to give him his birthday present and see him before we headed home, then a quick pokemon hunt and it was bed time.
I started crying when we were in bed, as I hadn't felt so alive and happy like I had those past few days and I was dreading going home the next day... I was trying to convince Russ to stay another night in the cabin but he said we really couldn't afford another night. He said if my nan would let us stay at hers that we can stay another night, I could see mum and the kids a little more and have dinner with them and then I could catch up with one of my oldest and dearest friends the next morning for a cuppa before we left.
So my nan said "of course you can stay" and so we did.
When we left on Wednesday we had to make sure we left Kempsey by 10AM as I had to be in Coffs by 12PM. For months I had been looking forward to Turia Pitt coming to Coffs and speaking, and it is something on my bucket list to hear her speak and hopefully meet her. I just think she is so incredible with what she went through and how she doesn't let anything get in her way of achieving anything, she sets her mind on something and works her ass off and she makes shit happen... I had a few friends hear her speak and spoke of how incredible and inspiring her talks were.
So I went along to her talk (along with my nan and her sister) and we had a nice lunch and then Turia spoke. She made us laugh, I know I cried, but she really inspired me.
and guess what...
Afterwards I got to meet her! I asked her to sign a copy of my book (her book she wrote) and told her that it was on my bucket list to hear her speak and she said "well mate I am fucking honoured".
I walked out of there trying so hard not to cry, not sad tears but really happy elated tears you have when something you have wanted came true and I was just so full of emotion and excitement... she really is remarkable!
So that brings us to Wednesday night and I was so exhausted I went to bed early and woke the next day with the flu, Russ was sick too and only returned to work yesterday. I felt better yesterday (from the flu) but was in bed dealing with girl issues... it has been over a year since my last period and it returned yesterday and has been rather painful... so I have been pretty much back in bed since Wednesday night.
But my pain is a bit more controlled now, just taking pain meds more regularly and it is helping a lot.
So that is my recap of the month that was July, was a crazy busy month... next month might be as crazy (we hopefully get the keys for the new house... IF IT IS FINISHED urgh it is taking forever) but I am in LOVE with my new kitchen.
Thanks for all the support and for following my journey.